Post by Chicago Astronomer - Astro Joe on Aug 26, 2004 0:45:42 GMT -6
Chicago Astronomer Joe's possible Travel Log
The following is a possible turn of events on my way to Al's home in Woodstock Illinois in October...
As I lose my place in the convoy to Woodstock, I fumble my path toward the star party locale...hopefully before sundown!
1st Stop: After a long drive in unfamiliar settings, I stop by this nice house and ask if Al the Amateur Astronomer is around here. Bothered by my ignorance, I get nebulous directions by a slight head nod and door slam. I see him reaching for his cell phone as he peers through his large pane window. How nice I think…he’s calling ahead for me. I head in the direction of his nod.
2nd Stop: Relieved that my long trip is finally concluded, I bang on the outside of my car door, whilst leaning on the horn, yelling out Al’s name and doing a magnificent figure 8 on his lawn. This is by far…the best figure 8 I have ever accomplished…sand, snow or mud. I wait a few moments, and start again. I am interrupted by some large man who comes out with shorts and black socks, with a look of astonishment on his face and tightly gripping a fireplace poker. Yelling himself now, he shouts “What the hell are you doing? I promptly leave.
3rd Stop: Having sped away at a higher speed than I am accustomed to, I manage a weaving, but controlled path to a body of water. I splash my face and think to myself perhaps I should have prepared better. I drive back to the road, knocking off children’s swingsets and other toys off of my car.
4th Stop: I once again take a chance and stop by this pleasant house with a welcome sign. I rap on the door and ask if Al the Astronomer lives around here. I get “Who?” I return to my vehicle and move on.
5th Stop: Now I’m really lost and need to get my bearings. I look down this path to my left, and see it invaded by raccoons. I mean raccoons everywhere! Certainly it can’t be down there…and I move on.
6th Stop: I’m totally lost. I approach this house that is secluded and notice no evidence of wildlife. A toothless white hair older woman answers my knock and nods intently to my queries. She wants to show me something…in the back. Something about Al waiting for me in the shed. I drop loose change to distract her and move on.
7th Stop: My spidey sense tells me that going further in this direction will lead me to banjo music. So I decide to turn left.
8th Stop: I stop by the Triangular crop formation. Obviously the work of aliens, now I know I’m close! I do the “Close Encounter of the Third Kind” hand signs in homage, and continue.
9th Stop: I stop cold at a wall of flora. I get out and lay my map on my hood to regain my bearings. While attempting to figure out which way is north, I see from the corner of my eye…a slight movement - just to the other side of the treeline. I then see soft avocados, stock certificates, wallets, bigmacs and other trappings tossed out onto the cul-de-sac…all with strong strings attached to them. Although the bigmac DOES seem appetizing, I decide against it, as I remember hot pizza pies are in store later. I slowly turn around and back track.
10th Stop: The raccoons now are all lined up along the sides of this road that I passed earlier, leading me into this direction. I feel like I’m expected, as they close up ranks behind me and start to approach me. I throw old .096 eyepieces at them, but to no avail. I push on.
11th and Final Stop: I see a flashing light in the near distance. It’s Al…and he’s using his parabolic mirror off his C8 to signal me to floor it as he blinds the raccoons that have hopped on my car, gnawing at the tires and covering my windshield. Luckily we both know Aldis Lamp signals and I can interpret his direction with clarity. Most jump off before I do highspeed doughnuts in celebration of an uneventful trip to Woodstock.
I need to find a different route on the way back.
